Searching for Sophia at Starbucks

On the first night of the conference the leaders of GCN announced a new name for the organization to better reflect the evolving diversity of the LGBTQ Christian community. Q Christian Fellowship was born with a fresh, new and exciting logo.

If the Reformation Project conference last October felt like a coming home, QCF felt to me like the family had left home and was on a trip somewhere. It’s much more active and dizzying with sensory overload.

So by the end of the second day, I was exhausted and tired. As grateful as I was to have been at the Trans Retreat that day, I was missing my friends. The fact that I wasn’t able to share a meal with them, made me sad. Walking out of the main convention area toward the exit, I sat alone at a bench facing the exit. A wave of sadness overwhelmed me. I knew that my anti-depressant was wearing off. But there, in the dark hours of the night, inside the foyer of the Denver Convention Center, I felt especially alone. After a few minutes of should-I-or-shouldn’t-I… I sent off a message to Adrienne to see if she wanted to have coffee. Maybe I could catch them all at the end of dinner. I could meet them where they were. To my surprise she was back at her hotel with her daughters. While they rested, Adrienne said she’d be able to meet me for coffee.

Instead of attending that evening’s conference program, which included a vigil for LGBTQ people who had died—something my depression told me I wasn’t able to handle at the time—I sat with my friend, chatting over coffee. (The most favorite thing for me to do.) I was secretly so grateful that God had afforded me this moment in the midst of a very busy conference. I couldn’t believe my luck. I couldn’t believe the goodness of this moment. A moment in which I was surprised to hear myself telling Adrienne that I was ready in my heart to begin HRT.

Then, like a cherry atop a sundae, my new friend Sydney walked in. I enthusiastically called her over. After talking for a bit more, the three of us headed back toward the convention center. Sydney wanted to retire for the night, so it was just me and my bestie. (Is it ok if I call you that?😋)


This is the third in a series of five about my trip to the Q Christian Fellowship Conference in January 2018. Read the first entry here and the second entry here

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